"Finally" found an excuse

I "at last" and found an excuse, that is, is to make the excuse of slack himself slowly decay excuse, is to make yourself in silence, but also the dying slowly excuse yourself the source of the pain.

For over ten years my life so had been vicious circle, I also in, slowly kill themselves in over the spirit, mind.

So are the tonight, I had planned on tonight after class to read a book, but in a heap of the mud like again now. Just give home dozen telephone, raising tuition fees problem, really, this is my deadly pain. Parents have never support I read the meaning of the university, and in college before I did say to yourself, try not to family want money, even if starve to death or life in this world would have is a misfortune, is a pain. So every time they asked me to don't money I have attempted to pass is, no want them to give the meaning of money, and they also won't want send money, because they did not have enough concern to me, was born in such family was also made me life misfortune, formed such a character is my destiny of misfortune. I this person is so every other people don't mind I paid for taiyuan things, even if one day they out of compassion to me only a little, I will think long time to accept, or direct rejected. Parents don't want to pay the tuition fee, eating my money. Every time they all are of helpless, because, after all, is her daughter, and not let me live, so many times I starve to choose starved to death, also not taiyuan meaning to accept their "generous" to give.

Now I two years of tuition fees are not hand in, although I often because this fall and helpless situation, and also because this often unintentionally, learn from those who live, or even pain produce out of school idea, I still don't taiyuan meaning to voluntarily they want money. Because I had secretly pledge in the heart, they do not need to give money can go to college.

But now, though I was in school, but never happy lead. Few people can understand, a personal material deprivation brings the mental distress, and the borrower kinds of, here even reading, perhaps it is a crime.

It seems a little bit mom or care about me, at least she still call I eat breakfast, don't hungry, I should be this sentence touched,,,

If it is before I will be in at save, but now I can't. Do not feel the need for that, people came to this world was unfortunate, are also made for himself unfortunate? Don't luxury, but at least to keep normal life.